Sunday, April 20, 2008

Girls, girls, girls...The Panera Experience

So Mike and I are sitting in Panera Bread working on some things. We'd been there for about three hours when a couple of girls walk in. Personally neither of them were my style, so I looked at them and got right back to business. We stayed for about another hour and a half before we'd finally wrapped things up. I'm walking out the door and a Panera employee is walking behind me. I held the door open for her, and as I turned to walk to the car, she stopped me and told me her girl wanted to talk to me. Her girl was one of the ladies that walked in at the beginning of the story. Kindly I told her, I didn't have time to talk because I had other obligations. I said tell your girl sorry, but she was in there for over an hour and didn't say anything to me.

What I wanted to tell her was that whole "my girl wants to talk to you," shit hasn't happened since I was in high school and she needed to step her swaggy up. But I'm not that rude, so I kept it polite. However after some careful thought, I realized it takes a certain confidence this day and age for a girl to make any sort of approach to a guy (even if it's kinda childish). This made me wonder why more women don't ever make a move to talk to a man. I really don't get it. A guy is more likely to remember the one girl that approaches him than the twenty girls that turn him down. Hell even if you aren't the best looking person on the planet, a little confidence goes a long way, and making the first move is the ultimate display of a woman who's secure with herself.

Girls are such hypocrites. One minute they're talking that "I.N.D.E.P.E.N.D.E.N.T." trash and then when you ask them why they don't approach dudes they tell you that they're traditional and old fashioned. I heard one girl on the radio say that she'd never approach a man, and that guys should make the first move because we're used to getting rejected. What the hell does that mean? Getting turned down is a hard part of life and though we may know how to bounce back, that doesn't mean we're immune to the humility that comes with it.

As lame as this girl in Panera Bread was for her tactics, she gets my respect for going after what she wanted. She might have been a little more successful had she come up to me directly, but the middle man approach could work for some guys. My point is, she went out of her way to let me know that she wanted to talk to me. She didn't wait on tradition to come to her, and she wasn't afraid of doing something that most girls won't do. It was refreshing to see someone be unorthodox and for that she gets applauded. If more girls went after the guy they wanted, they'd probably get the guy they wanted. Start being more assertive and stop being afraid that you're gonna get turned down. Plus I'm sure if you asked the girl at Panera Bread how she deals with rejection, she'll smile and kindly say that it's not that bad, and after a while, you'll get used to it.

-Ant

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